(If you recall, a fine line post is something that Val @ The Innocent Smiley– who, today is my graphic twinsie, because out of alll the designs on Canva, we somehow picked the same template, Holly @ The Fox’s Hideaway, Amber @ YA Indulgences, and I came up with to talk about things that might not be popular, but are worth discussing.)
Hello, my darlings. You all know that I adore you, right? I sure hope you do. Can I tell you what one of my absolute favorites things to see when I wake up is? It’s an email with all the amazing thoughts you guys have left for me! It seriously makes my day! And then, I get emails from your blogs, or click on your links, and I read your things, and I cannot wait to share my thoughts for you on your amazing posts!
But then. Then some kid is throwing a fit (it’s my child, not like, a random street child), or someone has an appointment, and I am basically held captive for a long time. So I come back, and I eagerly start commenting, because quite frankly, I like to! I mean, you have seen my novella comments- I am not phoning it in 🙂 And as I was replying to some particularly fun comments on my 5th Wave movie post, I noticed the date of the post. A full week ago.
But I keep going. I asked a few other bloggers how much time they spent returning comments and commenting back. The responses varied a lot, anywhere from an hour or two a week to “I lost count” (fine, fine, that one is just me).
And I have felt bad for not being able to comment and respond as much as I want. So bad. I kept apologizing about it in my weekly recap- then I even cut out the weekly recap hoping to have more time. (For the record, it hasn’t really worked, but that’s another issue entirely.) Anyway, while I was literally losing sleep over this, I read a post that Tonyalee @ Lilybloombooks wrote. She addressed the whole “commenting back” movement, and in doing so, a lot of the concerns I had. I kind of felt better reading through the comments, knowing that I wasn’t alone in worrying about this.
And yet… that nagging feeling of inadequacy never went away. Every few weeks I’d see a post pop up about blogging tips, or best practices, or what have you, and they’d all talk about how a blogger must comment/reply. Some even said they wouldn’t visit a blog that appeared to have not responded to a post.
And that seems plain unfair.
You know, the thing about blogging that I think we all forget (I know I am definitely guilty!) from time to time is that it really isn’t any of our livelihoods. And even if by chance it is yours (and seriously, I am applauding and want tips ASAP!), it isn’t ever that serious. No one is ever going to list “lack of comments back” as a cause of death. And I will stand by this statement: You never know what is going on in someone else’s life. It’s a slippery slope to condemn someone based on a few missed comments.
That isn’t to say it’s cool for people to just ignore each other.
I mean, technically, if you really want to, have at it? Ignore away? But that isn’t really going to foster discussion, and I write this stuff hoping to be able to chat with others about it, to see everyone’s viewpoints. This is a very social thing for me, and I do intend for it to stay that way. I don’t want to shout into the void- I want to talk to this community! But again, that is certainly a person’s prerogative- and a commenter’s prerogative to not bother anymore.
So… what are you even saying?
I’m saying that I don’t think commenting needs to be an “all or nothing” approach. I do not keep a tally chart to keep tabs on when people comment on my blog, or when I comment on others. I try to make my rounds. I try to respond, even though I am usually behind a few
days weeks. And I hope that we can appreciate that more than likely, most of us are trying. Trying really hard. I know that the bloggers I have spoken with genuinely enjoy commenting. I know I do. I also know that sometimes you just can’t help when life gets in the way.
Let’s take a poll!
We all want to know what our friends think, right? Let’s find out!