Blog Tour Review: Thirteen Ways to Kill Lulabelle Rock by Maud Woolf

A washed up star creates a clone tasked with eliminating other clones of herself; a whip-smart and thrilling sci-fi read that's perfect for fans of Orphan Black, Killing Eve and Keeping it Real by Justina Robson.

Set in a world of the near future, the celebrity elite have access to a technology that allows them to make perfect copies of themselves, known as Portraits. These Portraits exist to fulfil all the various duties that come as the price of fame.

Our protagonist is the thirteenth copy made of the actress known as Lulabelle Rock. Her purpose is very to track down and eliminate her predecessors.

While initially easy, her task is made difficult by the labyrinthine confusion of Bubble City and the unfortunate stirrings of a developing conscience. When she makes the mistake of falling in love with one of her targets, the would-be assassin faces the ultimate question; when you don’t want to kill yourself, what’s the alternative?

Content Warning: violence, blood, suicide, implied sexual content

I have been excited for Thirteen Ways to Kill Lulabelle Rock since I first heard the premise. I mean, come on, a clone made for the sole purpose of killing all the other incarnations of Lulabelle, by OG Lulabelle herself? Goodness, yes! And I am happy to report, this book absolutely lived up to the hype I’d given it in my head!

First, while it is a book about murdering, it is delightfully fun! That is not to say it doesn’t have its serious moments, because it absolutely does. But the humorous parts really make the murder-y bits quite a bit more palatable.

“But you must try not to think like that. You’ll only confuse yourself. I grew up in the countryside. You were fished out of a vat in my basement.”

So, Lulabelle Rock is famous, but man, being famous is hard work! And as one does when they have disposable income but not enough time, Lulabelle has made some clones to help her out with various aspects of her life. Big party she doesn’t feel like attending? There’s a clone for that! Tedious social media posting? No worries, got one for that too! Only, sometimes managing clones is hard, and since Lulabelle has a new movie coming out that she’s worried about ruining her career… well, maybe killing a bunch of Lulabelles will make for some renewed attention!

Our particular Lulabelle, 13th of her kind, is pretty okay with the murdering. I mean, this is her purpose after all. And the clones (or “Portraits” as they’re referred to here) are made for specific purposes, right? After a little heart to heart with her maker, she sets off, making very calculated plans to off the Lulabelles.

As the journey takes Lulabelle 13 to see (and dispose of) her clones, we get to see if it is really so easy to murder- even if it is quite literally your whole purpose. It is thought provoking, fun, and at times even quite emotional. And underneath it all is another layer of mystery that adds to the excitement and readability. Add to it, that the journey makes Lulabelle think quite a bit too, and it leads to some great character development, which is impressive, even more so considering this is a short book about someone who has just come out of a vat, more or less. Cannot wait for whatever the author does next!

Bottom Line: This one has it all: murder, mystery, humor, camaraderie, clones… what more could you need?

About Maud Woolf

Maud Woolf is a one-time bookseller at Forbidden Planet. She was a student on the Glasgow University Creative Writing course and graduated with an MLit with distinction. She has had a number of short stories published in online magazines but this is her debut novel. She lives in Glasgow.

FANTASY HIVE ARTICLE: Read about Maud’s journey from bookseller to author here!

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Would you want some clones to help you out? Or is it too messy to even think about?