I know that a lot of you are feeling the way I am feeling today: Scared, shocked, appalled, sad, angry. Probably a bunch of other things too that I can’t quite put into words. As such, I didn’t feel like I could post about bookish things right now. Sure, books are important, and I know we’ll get back to them eventually. But right now? Right now, we need to take care of ourselves and each other.
Thing is, I am pretty bad at keeping my mouth shut and quietly taking a break, so I had to tell you about it. Because frankly, you guys get it. When I was on Twitter last night, in an actual mid-panic attack, you were there. When others were terrified because they quite literally didn’t feel safe in their own skin, you were there. And I think that is the key. While I tweeted last night that I had lost my actual faith in the goodness of people, I didn’t mean all people, I didn’t mean you. I think that I had been naively thinking that the general public was less hateful than they seem to be, and for that, I am sorry. I wish I had seen it sooner, I wish I had done more.
I want this post to come from a positive place, though. So I am pushing away my fear for the moment, and I am going to try to pour every ounce of optimism I have in my soul onto you all. In the wake of this, our country’s darkest moment in my lifetime certainly, I saw so many moments of little blessings. I saw authors and readers holding each other up, I saw people turning to each other in support, I saw so much love. Of course there was anger, but even the anger came out of a place of love for fellow humans.
Right now, I can’t think about posting bookish stuff. Mostly because I am so, so scared about my rights, my children’s rights, and all of your rights being stripped from us. But don’t underestimate the power of books, even in a time like this. I dare say I would have fallen apart without the bookish community last night. Authors consistently write books that have us all learning and doing better. And that is what it will take to turn this around.
So books will be back, my heart may need another day or two to regain some strength. Mostly, I wanted to just share that I love you all, and that these comments are 100% open for YOU. Answering them will be my top priority for the next few days. If you need to talk, I am here. If you want to talk privately, all my info is in the sidebar and my DMs are open. If you need someone to talk to, I am here. I may cry with you, but at least we’ll be together.
And, in the interest of looking for the little positives we can find… here’s a really cute dog that my parents are fostering and hoping to adopt. Her name is Peanut and I love her.
Peanut will make you smile a little ♥
♥♥♥
Thanks, love! ♥
I’m so shocked with the result. I’m no American but whatever happens in America always affect the rest of the world and it scares me too. I can’t imagine how people feel there. I’m really happy though seeing people protesting, they’re fighting for their rights and what they’re believe in. They’re uniting together trying to make US a better place. I hope everyone stay safe, and I hope things will get better soon❤
I hope so too. And I hope that it doesn’t have an awful effect on the rest of the world, but I fear that it will too. I just wish there was something more to be done. It seems so damn hopeless, you know? Ugh.
I’m seeing a lot of similar responses throughout the blogs and Twitter. I’m sorry for what’s happening to your country.
I hope you’re well and that you’ll get through this tough time with friends and family.
I feel like I’m writing a condolences card, like someone died, but there it is. 🙁
Thank you so much, it really means a lot ♥♥ It DOES almost feel like death honestly. A death in everything I believed in, in the hope for our future. It’s so incomprehensible. And scary. And I appreciate your thoughts so, so much.
<3 Lots of hugs to you and Peanut!
Aw thanks ♥♥
As someone from the UK I can honestly say that we’re all heartbroken for you, and I hope you and every other American out there know that there are plenty of people outside of the States you can turn to, too. After Brexit this has terrified the whole world and I’m so sorry for you that not enough people realised what a nasty little man Trump is. Love trumps hate! We’re all thinking of you and are here for you as citizens, not of our countries, but of the world.
Sending lots of love your way, Shannon. xxx
Thank you SO, so much. I seriously don’t understand it- especially since Brexit literally gave us a “WHAT NOT TO DO” guide, basically. Yet no one listened. Or, not enough people, anyway. I don’t understand how anyone can support him- it is downright terrifying. And I am SO sorry that this will undoubtedly have ramifications for the rest of the world too. I really, really appreciate the love and kind words ♥♥♥
God I’m still numb. But as the days go on I feel angrier instead of sadder. Take care of yourself!
I feel the same way, love. At first, it was just sobbing, and now… it’s still tears, but mixed with so much anger. I hope you are able to take care of yourself too. And hopefully, we will be able to get through this, somehow ♥♥
I’m glad that you found support on Twitter. Yes, it’s a very scary time right now for everyone in America. We crashed the Canadian immigration site for Pete’s sake! I’m hoping that much of what he said was bluster to win, but I’m not optimistic. Something really needs to be done about the electoral college! Thanks for ending with peanut. ☺ We all needed that. I hope you’re okay.
I agree with you on all counts. I am not optimistic either- frankly, the more I hear, the less optimistic I become- but… I also don’t know what to DO. I want to DO something, you know? I hope you are okay too, my dear. ♥♥♥
Like a lot of people, I am stunned. Absolutely stunned. At how what seemed so possible (and probable) went so wrong. How people could chose hate and fear and exclusion. How people could choose divisiveness over inclusion and togetherness. These past two days I’ve been dealing with it by basically refusing to deal with it. I just can’t right now. I can’t think about what the next few years will bring and what it will do to this country that my husband has fought to protect. So for now, for my own well-being, I’m just not dealing at all. I’m not even allowing myself to think about it. There will be plenty of time for that. But for now: I. Just. Can’t.
I think that is good, honestly. Self care is super important right now. If I knew any way to STOP thinking about it, I would be all over it. But my mind is wayyy too fixated at this point. I wish I had a way to fight it. But I only had my ONE vote. I wish I had done more though- I think I will always feel that way, even though I know it changes nothing. Tell your husband thank you for me please. He is a true hero ♥ Love you, try to hang in there, my dear.
*Hugs* I’ve probably thrown up more in the last few days than I have in the last few years. I’m scared of all the racists who have been emboldened by this. I’m scared for the safety of my friends. I can’t even type a coherent response to your post because I’m numb. It’s like being trapped in a nightmare.
YEP that is how I feel too. Like the moment was awful, but the aftermath of hate on parade is so much more disturbing, because it’s basically like saying “yes, all your worst fears ARE coming true”. And you are right- it feels like a never ending nightmare. I wish I had some kind of hopeful response too, but alas. Just LOTS of hugs, my dear ♥♥
Thank you so much for this post. My anxiety and depression have both gotten so out of hand since the election results came out. I’m just trying to be there for the people who need my support most right now. The small acts of kindness I’ve seen on my campus (despite everyone seeming completely numb) over the past few days have warmed my heart. And, like you said, the online bookish community has become such a supportive space, too. We’re all in this together. My DMs are also always open if you need it! Sending lots of love your way!
Aw, of course! I feel you, mine have been sooooo out of control. REALLY bad. Like, I took two klonopin and I still couldn’t get my heart to stop racing. I seriously felt like I was going to die. So I understand completely. And thank you SO much, mine are open to you too, always ♥♥ I am SO glad you have seen acts of kindness in your daily life. Those help so much. Lots of love to you, too!
*sends hugs* I’m so sorry for you Shannon. And for America in general. Well, I mean, I’m sorry for the whole world because this greatly affects us ALL and it’s just disgustingly the worst. I actually didn’t think it would happen. How were people ignoring the facts???? omg. And it totally scares me how the little progress that has been made in making the world a better place for minorities and diversity is going to go backwards.
Take care of yourself though, and I’m thinking of you!!
Thank you SO much, Cait. I don’t understand it either. As long as I live, I will NEVER understand it. And I am sorry that this country has put the entire WORLD on edge with its shitty decision. I really appreciate the thoughts and support, love ♥♥♥
Feeling this and feel the same way. I have no motivation to blog. I am HERE for YOU, too. Still sad, angry, confused and shocked but we must support each other
I am so sorry, Eva. I know how awful it is. I have no motivation, everything seems so… unimportant in comparison. I can’t stop crying, I don’t know what to do. And you are SO RIGHT we must support each other- it is SO important. Because some moments, I will have my shit together and be able to support others. And then maybe in another moment, like this one I am typing to you as I sob, I will need the support you are giving me. I love you, hang in there ♥♥
I felt the same way. I backed away from Facebook yesterday (I don’t know when I’ll go back). I cried and shut down, BUT I realized that that wasn’t what I want to do. I’m sad, yeah, but like you and others, I am so very angry.
I’m going to live with this in mind: Choose strength. Choose kindness. Choose love. Always. From what I’ve seen in the bookish community on Instagram (very positive place!), this is the anthem for everyone there. 🙂
I feel you, it is so hard to navigate it all. I don’t like FB in general, it feels toxic to me, so I try to avoid it in general, but I have also been trying to weed out some people I don’t need in my life on there, you know? I LOVE your mindset. That is SO TRUE and definitely something we all need to remember, so thank you SO MUCH for sharing that ♥♥
*hugs* I’m so thankful for all the people that I follow on Twitter, because they really did show the positive in the world (and especially in the U.S.). I think Facebook is one of the worst social media sites to read at the moment though. I hope everyone is taking care of themselves. Don’t feel selfish. We have to be okay first to help others.
-Lauren
Hugs right back at you, love ♥♥ And I agree so much- I don’t know WHAT I would have done without Twitter. Hannah Moskowitz, trying to be uplifting, stuff like that, and then when we knew the worst… then people just rallying behind each other was so, so incredible. And I just have to hope that it doesn’t stop, now that we’re a few days out. And thank you, my dear. It means a lot- you are right about taking care of ourselves to take care of each other, so please be sure to take care of you, too. If you ever need anything, please don’t hesitate, I am here!
I know it’s an incredibly scary and depressing time for lots of people Shannon <3 thank you for sharing your thoughts with us and you know I am there for you <3
Thank you SO much, love ♥♥ Your support means SO very much to me. I wish I could somehow express how much, but when I try to I just cry- but the happy kind of tears that I am lucky enough to have friends like you. ??
Sending my love all the way from suriname,south america. Hugs, Shannon
Thank you SO much ♥♥♥ I really appreciate it, it means the world to have such wonderful and amazing people to lift us up during these dark times.
♥ ♥ ♥
Also Peanut is ADORABLE!
Thanks, love. I hope she is okay, she’ll be going to the vet tomorrow. I really need her to be okay, she’s been my only bright spot, and definitely my parents’ only bright spot. When I went to visit them, she let me just hug her and cry. She’s a wonderful dog. I am just hoping and praying that she is okay.
I work overnight and I was at work while all of the results were rolling in. I was absolutely shocked and numb and honestly could not perform my job. I took a week off from social media in general, but now that I have had time to step away and practice some self care, I am ready to do something. I am getting in touch with many of my activist friends from college and I am ready for real action. I live in a small town that still has KKK rallies, so the fear is REAL. It has been for a long time, and now, more than ever, I know that I need to do what I can to help make my town safe.
Oh my goodness, I am SO sorry that you have to live in such imminent fear. I cannot even imagine, please stay safe ♥ I don’t even know how you managed to not run screaming from work- I was crying so hard I couldn’t even breathe. It is SO great that you are getting prepared to do stuff, too! I have drafts of letters (heard that letters work better than emails) and set up some recurring donations, but I know I need to do MORE. I wish I had a better game plan, you know? Because I absolutely want to make sure everyone is safe, and you know, free. This whole thing is so damn heartbreaking. And self care is SO important- I say that to everyone, yet I don’t practice what I preach. I have barely slept at all in the past week, I need to find a way to pull it together, and fast. BIG hugs to you- and let me know if there is anything you could use help with, I am definitely all about doing anything that needs to be done at this point!
You already know how I feel but I’ll just say – I don’t care how aggrieved or left behind or what ever the rural people, the whites, all the people who voted for this guy- it’s just not acceptable. the thought of the Trump family in the White House sickens me. the thought that Obama had to be nice to this guy- same thing. Now they’re saying he was surprised to learn he had to staff the whole West Wing. the guy is clueless. And it’s really dangerous for our country, even if he wasn’t a bigot and everything else- to have such amateurs take over. The people who voted for him- I just don’t get it.
I’m ashamed of this country. And all the patriotism police who always say “Well if you don’t like America, leave” can shove it up their ass. No it’s my country too and we don’t just “leave” when mistakes are made. Now we have to fix this mess. It’s ridiculous. I hope the protests continue and America needs to stop lecturing the world because we just f’ed it everything up. But like you, it’s been inspiring to see the book community come together on Twitter and elsewhere- there are good things happening amongst the bad.
Oh and the fact that the KKK still even eXISTS is mind boggling to me. SMH.
Peanut’s a cutey. 🙂
YES. Yes to absolutely ALL of this. I agree with you 100%. Like, do they realize that they just elected a reality TV host to be leader of the free world? How… how did that make sense to ANY PERSON? I also agree that he would have been an awful choice even if he wasn’t so hateful- and the fact that he is just makes him THAT much dangerous, especially since it seems he is surrounding himself with people more awful than he is, which, tbh, I didn’t even know was POSSIBLE.
And this is a job he does NOT WANT. He wants the fame and power, but none of the work. I have even tried to read stuff from people who voted for them- trying just to MAYBE understand what they were thinking, even though I’ll never agree- but there has not been ONE thing that I read from ANY person who voted for him that wasn’t either selfish, uninformed, ridiculously asinine, or all of the above.
And I feel you about the Obamas too- THE classiest family to ever grace the White House, let’s be real. And even now, with this awfulness, they have been nothing but courteous and kind and hopeful. To go from them to the circus that will be the Trumps… it’s shameful, honestly. (As is the KKK- I agree, HOW is that a thing in 2016!? HOW?!)
And thanks! I got to see Peanut again today, I keep telling her that she is my bright spot, hahha. 😀 She’s so little and fluffy!
<3 <3 <3
Love youuuu ♥♥♥
There are no words to describe my feelings about the election. Upset would be an understatement. Honestly though, I can’t say I was that surprised. I was starting to lose my optimism in my country. Sigh. I am trying not to be all angry on Facebook, but it’s hard.