Paperweight by Meg Haston Published by HarperCollins on July 7th 2015
Pages: 304
Format:eARC
Source:Copy provided by publisher for review, via Edelweiss
Seventeen-year-old Stevie is trapped. In her life. In her body. And now in an eating-disorder treatment center on the dusty outskirts of the New Mexico desert.
Life in the center is regimented and intrusive, a nightmare come true. Nurses and therapists watch Stevie at mealtime, accompany her to the bathroom, and challenge her to eat the foods she’s worked so hard to avoid.
Her dad has signed her up for sixty days of treatment. But what no one knows is that Stevie doesn't plan to stay that long. There are only twenty-seven days until the anniversary of her brother Josh’s death—the death she caused. And if Stevie gets her way, there are only twenty-seven days until she too will end her life.
In this emotionally haunting and beautifully written young adult debut, Meg Haston delves into the devastating impact of trauma and loss, while posing the question: Why are some consumed by their illness while others embark on a path toward recovery?
Paperweight is not a happy book, or a fun book, or a cute book. Paperweight is an honest book, a necessary book, and a book that pulls no punches. You’re not going to want to be besties with Stevie, or hang out with her friends. You certainly don’t want her home life, her romantic life, or her emotional life. But her story was compelling, without question.
You see, Stevie is in a treatment facility for an eating disorder. She fully plans to kill herself by the anniversary of her brother’s death, and basically doesn’t think there’s anyone who can or will stop her. I had an almost morbid fascination over whether she would succeed in her goal, and it felt very disconcerting to be in the mind of someone whose only real plan in life is to end it. That isn’t a bad thing; it’s just the way it is.
Stevie is, from page one, incredibly unlikable. She resists any and all attempts to treat her, she wants nothing to do with anyone or anything at the facility. She’s convinced that she’s caused her brother’s death yet thinks nothing of the father she’ll be leaving alone. Her mother treated her horribly, then proceeded to abandon her family, so she’s still (rightfully) angry as hell. And her “friend” Eden… well, with friends like her, you wouldn’t need enemies.
There were some things that really stood out for me in this book. I shall tell you about them:
- Family played a huge role. I mean, the main causes for Stevie’s current state really begin and end with her family dynamics. The absent mother, the deceased brother that she misses like mad, and the father who’s left to deal with the aftermath. Not only is Stevie’s family a big part of the story, but it comes into play with fellow rehab patients as well.
- There is exactly zero dude-drama. None, nada, and holy crap, it was a breath of fresh air!
- The therapy is incredibly honest, and I appreciated that. It isn’t all roses and unicorns or whatever, and there are setbacks, and the people at this treatment facility acknowledge that. I was kind of blown away by the honest of this book, I think it may have been my favorite thing about it.
- I adored Stevie’s bunkmate, Ashley. There were times that I just wanted to give her a big old hug, and be her best friend.
- The story is painful, but it isn’t just for the sake of drama. No one is sitting around sugar coating Stevie’s illness, or her crappy attitude, least of all Stevie. She knows she is miserable and not really a joy to be around, but she doesn’t care, and is brutally honest about it. There’s also a ton of growth, but not in a ridiculous, unrealistic way- quite the opposite.
So, why isn’t this one a five star book for me? When it came down to it, I didn’t feel an emotional pull to Stevie, at least not as much of one as I’d have liked to. I felt the pull of the story, which is really wonderful, but I think had I connected a bit more to Stevie, I would have been even more invested. But even without that connection, I found the story to be very powerful.
Bottom Line: Paperweight was an incredibly honest look at an all too real problem. Stevie’s story may have had additional elements that made it more tragic, but the underlying issues and the treatment that went with it were portrayed wonderfully. The secondary characters worked well, and while I didn’t feel a huge connection to Stevie, I certainly had enough empathy to make the story resonate.
I’m going to be reading this one soon for review. I usually try to connect with the characters so I’m hoping I connect to her, seeing as we both dealt with similar yet different issues. I can’t wait to get into her head and read the story. I’m definitely glad you found this story to be powerful. My hopes have risen a bit for this book lovely review, Shannon 🙂
Thanks! Sadly, I read in your review that things did not go that well for you in terms of connection either 🙁 But still a decent read!!
YOU SUMMED UP MY THOUGHTS 100% And actually you are sooo much more eloquent than me. xD I just blathered about how Stevie was awful, but it made sense why. But at the end of the day: ME TOO. I just couldn’t adore the book because of the lack of emotional connection.
Ashley…omg, what a poor little lamb.
Pshhh, you are quite elegant m’lady 😉 You’re right though, she WAS awful, not that I even blamed her, I just wish I felt something MORE with her. I felt bad but… not bad enough I guess?
This is a FANTASTIC review! I have this book to read soon, and now I’m certainly more intriguing than I was before. Thanks for the warnings about Stevie, I keep it in mind.
Aw thanks!! She does have growth, so that is the good news! Hope you enjoy it!
Thanks! *fingers crossed*
This sounds like something my middle school teacher book club would jump all over. I kind of like that Stevie isn’t very sympathetic, since so many teens aren’t.
It IS quite realistic, especially after all the crap Stevie’s gone through.
A book with zero-dude drama? No way! Count me in. Haha.
This book sounds heartbreaking but I totally understand how not feeling connected or pulled to the main character can make it less enjoyable. I’ll definitely add this one to my TBR. =)
Yeah, I mean, there’s lots of OTHER drama, but still! It is really heartbreaking, even if I didn’t fully connect to her. It’s worth the read!
“An honest and necessary book” – YES. So much win – that’s exactly what this book is.
I loved how there wasn’t a romance in the “present” timeline; I think it would have cluttered things up too much.
I felt the same way about the book, in the end. It was great, and important, but I just needed to read it once and move on.
Exactly! I agree- I think it is refreshing that there was no romance, and it was ALL focused on the issue at hand. YEP- it isn’t one of those books that you fall in love with, but I WAS very glad I read it!
I am kind of interested in this one. I like the idea of no dude drama. And I am ok with he MC not being likable since it sounds like the book was still pretty decent. Great review!
Thanks so much! It is definitely worth a read, in my opinion!
I own a copy of this, I love the simplicity of the cover and the premise sounds really good too! I have been reading many mixed reviews about this one though 🙁 The MC doesn’t seem much likable but it still sounds like a beautiful read. Wonderful review Shannon!
Thanks so much! I was actually worried because of the opposite- a lot of people LOVEED it and I felt like I was a weirdo because I didn’t as much! But I DO still absolutely think it is worth reading!
This one sounds absolutely fabulous. I love the sound of the way family and friendship are portrayed in such an accurate and supportive light, and that the focus is completely on the story itself and Stevie healing and not romance. Thank you so much for sharing this – definitely going to have to check it out! Wonderful review, as always Shannon! ♥
Aw thanks so much! There is a romance bit, BUT it is just dealing with a past issue, nothing in the present!
Hi, I want this book so much.
Your review gave me even more desire to read it. I hope it come to Argentina soon <3
Your blog is lovely
Aw, I hope it gets there soon too! Does Book Depository deliver to Argentina? That could work 😀
I have this, and I am going to review it, but I’m afraid that I’m just not going to connect with Stevie at all. BUT OH WELL. I guess we’ll see when I read it!
AWESOME REVIEW SHANNNNNNNNNNNNNON
Well you may not. I didn’t. BUt it was still worthwhile I think, even if you don’t, so there’s that 🙂
First of all, I LOOOOOVE the new design and the header. It feel so light and refreshing to the eyes AND SO A JOB WELL DONE TO YOU, MY FRIEND! Next, I saw this book as an eARC on Edelweiss but I didn’t get it because I (incorrently) assumed it was a light, fluffy read. It apparently is not and I just love how you emphasized that things here were handled and portrayed in an honest way. That’s not something you usually see, as a lot of plot depend on OVER-THE-TOP drama to keep the tension going. I would love to read this one just to see that aspect alone!
Aww thank yoU! Hazel deserves at least 99% of the credit 😉 Especially since my “wants” were just “ummm I have no idea, something bright but still clean looking”- which, I think she nailed. The only stuff I did was tweak a few things here and there. So seriously, ALL Hazel!
I almost didn’t request on EW for the same reason! I am really glad I got greedy and went for it 😉
Thanks for this review! I hadn’t heard about this book before so I’m glad to have found it. I’m adding it as a read-a-like for A Trick of the Light by Lois Metzger which covers similar territory. (You know, if you want another book that is important but miserable to read because it’s so devastating at times.)
AHH that is a good spot for it- another good comparison is Little Peach by Peggy Kern- also miserable, but also terribly important!
Oh my! I know I read this review, but I guess I didn’t ever leave a comment, doh!
Great review! I felt like I could relate to Stevie more than Ashley, but that’s me. I also loved that there wasn’t any “dude drama”.
Thanks!! I was (am?) just more of an Ashley in life, which is probably why it ended up that way for me. I think “Stevies” will probably have a much easier time with emotionally connecting!
From what you’ve said, I think I’d feel the same in that I wouldn’t love or connect with Stevie but the book itself would draw me in. But despite having said that, I think I’ll try and give it a go, simply because it isn’t light and fluffy – it deals with serious subject matter. Great review!
Oh, definitely NOT light and fluffy. Pretty much zero percent fluff 😉 I do hope that you enjoy it- I think it’s definitely a powerful book!
Yeah, I would have been surprised if the family dynamics hadn’t played a huge part in it (I mean, especially with that, it’ usually tied to it) DUDE. No guy drama? BREATHE IN THAT FRESH AIR BEFORE IT DISAPPEARS. Yes to the honesty, being direct and blunt about it-especially her being that way-sounds like a step in the right direction. It’s not hiding behind anything. I was going to read this one a while ago, but then got to it and didn’t feel like it, but definitely going to it when I need something important.
I wasn’t going to read it either, TBH. I have been feeling kind of burned out by “issue” books, but this one was VERY different. I feel like it wasn’t MEANT to make me like Stevie, it was just meant to be HONEST. Which is insanely refreshing!